Just a school of fish.

23 Apr

It has been exactly 30 days since my last blog. THIRTY MOTHER FUCKING DAYS.

Did you miss me?

Well, as far as “pruning periods” go folks I’ve been chopped back to a stub with this one. Everything in my life has changed, turned upside down if you will. I’m 27 years old. I’ve started a new career. I’ve just left a 4-year relationship.

The question is…

Where do I go now?

Dating again after not dating for a prime 4-year period of your life is shit-ass-suck-pussy. Things change DRAMATICALLY pre and post major relationship. Before you have that first one, that big life changing relationship, partnership, and marriage, whatever you want to call it, that is ALL you want. You want someone to hold you at night. You want someone to come home to.

Then the big one hits.

And it seems like now relationships aren’t as much of a lifelong partnership as they are a cataclysmic wave that destroys your life and leaves you an emotional jigsaw puzzle where none of the pieces match up. Sure there are a few exceptions to the rule, there’s the rare breed of soul mates that still exist, and all relationships do have their good times. For the most part, however, the majority of us all swim through life alone.

The thing is when you re-emerge into this vicious world of dating at 27, most people around your age are either still in that first big tsunami or they’re still looking for it real hard.  Nobody just wants to date anymore, it’s like everyone’s evolved into lesbians.  Typical first dates involve hanging out and watching a movie, jumping straight into that “been together for months” phase.  What ever happened to just going out with someone and having fun?  You know what I mean, just enjoying a person’s company without the expectation of being together for the rest of your lives.  Without any expectations at all for that matter.

We’re all too damn picky, our heads are full of screwed up expectations. We want someone who meets unattainable expectations, and if by chance they do actually meet those expectations we create half a dozen more for them to live up to. How much does a person have to prove themselves before good enough is enough? We’ve been taught by our parents (and society as a whole for that matter) that we need to find someone who we can be 100% happy with, that fits our every need and meets our every specification – because THEY fallowed in THEIR parents footsteps and married someone who looked good on paper then they later discover they can’t stand to be around each other. It’s like embedding pickiness into their children was the only way to break this chain of lifelong servitude to another person. It’s our genetic memory stepping up and saying

“ENOUGH! Live life thoroughly, happily, never be confined to limitations and never confine someone else! JUST FUCKING LIVE ALREADY!”

Society is definitely changing romance. Nobody stays together anymore. It’s completely normal for people to have 5 marriages through their lives when fifty years ago a person would be shunned into a cave for such activities. We’re at the end of the age of Pieces, we’re all like fish – swimming together for a while then flapping away to swim with some other fish and so on. On the upside though, the silver lining if you will, we’re not all just swimming alone – we’re all just little fish in one big school.


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