The Secret Society of Women…

1 Dec

This morning I watched an episode of “The Brady Bunch” for the first time in years.  The episode was the one where Mike tries to teach the girls how to cook for their girl scout badge and Carol tries to show the boys how to play baseball.  I have to say, even for the time this has to be the most sexist thing I’ve ever seen!

Because there’s no way that women could EVER play baseball… when girls pick up a bat their brains get infused with MAN-AIDE and it goes COMPLETELY BONKERS.  There’s no WAY that women like Venus Williams or Flo Jo could ever understand the concept of physical athletic competition…

And as soon as the apron goes over a man’s head he reverts DIRECTLY back to ape form.   We turn into complete idiots and do things like drop everything we touch and burn water.  We can’t possibly clean nor do things like use simple household appliances.  Wolfgang Puck really has no idea what he’s doing and don’t even get me started on Emeril.

I’m always amazed when I watch shows like I Love Lucy, The Brady Bunch, Happy Days and most other shows from the era when women doing things like work outside the house was ridiculous.  It goes along with what I was saying yesterday about men being left to their own devices.  Until about 1960, for thousands of years the Secret Society of Women, who meet on their menstrual cycles in a 4th-dimensional astral plane that most of them aren’t even aware of, decided that they were tired of letting men think they’re 100% in control.

This high council of inner-goddesses decided that they were tired of the kitchen, they were all collectively bored.  It was probably soon after the episode of The Brady Bunch I just mentioned first aired.  Anyway, it was decided that they would rise up, so they all raised their fists in the air in unison.  When they returned to consciousness they all felt inspired and only the “womyn” of the neo-paganist and new age movements were aware of why.  This sparked the women’s rights movement that swept the world.

Now for the most part men still can’t cook.  Unless they’re gay.  Maybe that was the master plot of the Secret Society of Women, to turn the entire world gay so we’ll take care of ourselves and they don’t have to worry about us anymore.  I’m so all for it.  Now Bonanza is on.  It’s weird to think that most of those hot cowboys are either elderly or dead by now.

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